After more than a decade apart, the New Kids on the Block (NKoTB) have reunited with the impressive single, “Summertime.”
They’ve come back as a service to all. We ladies are being taught how much our tastes have matured, and the gents are being served up a step-by-step guide to hooking up summer love. So here it is y’all. The NKoTB Guide to Summertime Love. Don’t forget to take notes.
Lesson 1: Group dance in a inappropriate place. This tells the ladies that you aren’t afraid to take a risk for her love. Throw in pelvic thrusts so she knows you’re a real man.
Lesson 2: Matching outfits are cool. They show you belong even if you are a rebellious bad boy.
Lesson3: Keep your weird buddies in the back, in corners, and generally out of sight of all the hotties. Use them as your errand boys if you must. You’ll lure a philly from the pack as an offering.
Lesson4: No Matter where or what you are doing, pretend there is a dope beat in the background and choreograph all of your movements accordingly. This takes practice- you may need to practice in the bathroom mirror. This is normal and natural.
Lesson5: While you’re in the bathroom practicing your moves, take advantage of the acoustics to perfect your falsetto. Girls dig a man who can sing higher than them.
Lesson 6: Ask her if she remembers. She probably doesn’t, but it makes you look sensitive and sentimental. Feel free to make up a memory, but be careful and don’t overdo it. Make it something simple like “remember that time you were walking on the beach in those short shorts?” Don’t forget to chuckle.
Lesson 7: Have a special talent that differentiates you from your posse: weightlifting/running, ballroom dance, motorcyles, general badassness, or yahting. This tells the ladies that you have an identity outside of the group.
Lesson 8: Reunite with your former boy band even though you have a successful movie career and are regarded as a sex symbol and serious actor. No, you’re right, it just shows you aren’t embarrassed about your past. Way to do the unexpected! (I’m talking to you Donnie.)
Lesson 9: Use former song titles and lyrics as pickup lines. She’s probably too young to know any of your old hits! Hey, you’re an environmentalist, recycling is good for the planet. JACKPOT!
Lesson 10: Make her wonder if you’re really a spy. Wear shades, text group messages, get your old team together, and arrive in a helicopter.
Lesson 11: Tell her you’ll put her in your next music video. You won’t have to keep your promise because you won’t make another video because your comeback won’t last longer than one summer!
OH-OH!
I just finished listening to Nasri’s songs on his myspace and he is amazing. He is actually the reason the NKOTB is getting back together. Go check him out and have a listen you will love his music.
My favorite song is “NOT THE SAME”
He also co-wrote the new song Click Click Click and “summertime” for the NKOTB.
Myspace.com/nasriworld
GO NASRI